The Daily "Chain you to my Kitchen Stove" Search Update...

Mr. Needle in a Haystack (see below) is at it again. I respond...

barefoot and pregnant...

October 20th Update: So, I'm almost getting more responses than I can count that high let alone reply to. At last count I ran out of fingers and toes yesterday alone. So I’ve received more than I have fingers and toes. I have the regular amount of fingers and toes if you’re all curious.

But, obviously, I'm still writing this update, so that "One of a Kind" is still out there.

Today, all I wanted to say is that yesterday I posted, and I quote, “I can walk into a room full of angry people and they will all stop being angry and will love and adore me. Small birds alight on my outstretched arms when I’m in Rock Creek Park. Squirrels and raccoons will nuzzle my feet. I’m really good at parallel parking. So good in fact pedestrians erupt in spontaneous cheering when I do. I’ve won the Nobel Prize for “outstanding achievements in the pursuit of excellence.” The laws of physics don’t apply to me.”

This statement is entirely true. In addition, though I would like to add that high government officials have recently asked me to solve the crisis in the Middle East with my smoldering good looks. I’ve played tennis naked while people cheered my grace and dignity on the court. People, who don’t even know me, stop me on the street and ask me questions. Questions like, “when did you become so fantastic or were you born that way?” or “you have great hair, can I copy your hairstyle?” and even “how do I get to the zoo?” I’ve also been favorably compared to Jesus AND the Dalai Lama.


*Previous update and original posting below*

Hope everyone's having a great day!