Meet my best friend - 37

It's totally not me. Honest. I'm really looking for a date for my best friend (permalink).

I'm posting this for one of my closest friends and he has no idea! He is always there for me. He is the one that introduced me to eating exotic and endangered species. He is the one that has a big medallion of gold. He taught me that wearing leather pants and not shirt can look good on some people. He taught me how to love again. He is attractive and tall with ripped definition. He likes looking at himself in the mirror, posing for what he calls “the lovelies” in metro stations and the 42 bus, Deca-durabolin, and working out. He’s a triple black belt in the ancient and deadly art of Shohei-Ryu-Bollywood Karate. He drinks a lot of Goldschlager because he says it enhances his “inner bling.” He has been known to compare himself favorably with the likes of the Dalai Lama and Jesus. He has a solid career with a large multinational corporation, which he talks about incessantly…stuff like “I took a meeting today with Isaac Mizrahi to discuss the creation of a line of flannel shirts with the arms pre-ripped off for yours truly and others who appreciate a good pump. He wants me to endorse the product line.” But you can usually get him to shut up if you show him your breasts.

He has never been in a long term relationship, but he’s dated a lot and has told me on numerous occasions that he is expert in the art of man on woman sensuality. I asked him once what that meant and he said, “For example, Tao: Cat And Mice Sharing A Hole, Cicada On A Bough, and the Dragon Turns. Also, the secrets of the Yoni: the Uchchushita then the Jihva-bhramanaka, telling him to cleave asunder that archway with his nose and letting his tongue gently probe her yoni with his nose, lips and chin slowly circling. And don’t forget the Mausala, where stiff as a pole in the bed's center, I make love to a woman in way that would make her coo and warble like a woodpigeon.” Huh, I replied.

I asked him what age range he would prefer (I was secretly planning this) he said: 24-35 or so. He told me he would ONLY want a woman who was down to earth, easy going, not demanding or smothering. An insecure woman whom he can fix. A woman who knows that being with him will enhance her life in tangible and meaningful ways. She might even like guys who brood rather than are sparkly. She would have to care about her body since he does. NO BBW's, Rubenesque, Curvy, Cuddly, Irish, or Fatty Fat Fats. She would not be judgmental or stereotypical, but she must love to laugh, be sarcastic and not take life or herself to seriously.

With all this being said I thought I would try a CL ad to see if anyone could be a match for him. I know what he likes. I know what he hats. I can tell you he is not desperate. Please send me an email and a picture of yourself. I will forward it to him If I feel he would be interested.

Hope everyone finds what they are looking for!

Peace