I am the guy who...

I am the guy who has the world's most active imagination! (permalink).

Enters the bar, scanning the room for ladies that need a little Mr. BH action. I am the guy whose head bobs in rhythm to music only I can hear as I twirl my chest hair with thumb and index finger. I’m in my Carla Behrle leather pants. No shirt. And yes that my medallion of a Buddha Vitarka Mudra flanked by a couple of Bodhisattvas resting on my rock hard pecs is solid gold. I am the guy who sees you from across the bar with your friends. I am the guy who can intuit that you’re in serious need of the kind of hot animalistic man on woman sensuality that only I can provide...I am the guy who when our eyes connect, you are like a deer caught in headlights. You are mesmerized by my robust manliness as I approach ... I am the guy who orders Cadenhead's Old Raj Gin and Hybolin Decanoate…and for you an appletini ... I am the guy who you will come to find out later is a true romantic but for know we are intensely gazing into each other’s eyes... I am the guy who, while you’re not looking, slips a rohypnol into your drink because I am the guy who believes in love at first sight…I am also a guy who believes in chivalry so I will carry you back to my place when you pass out...I am the guy who, upon getting back to my place, will lay you gently in my bed and undress you...I am the guy who knows my confidence is a turn on for you unconscious or not… I am the guy who will then make love to you all night, videotaping everything so I can watch it later...I am the guy who puts you in a cab when you start to regain consciousness... I am this guy.

He gets letters:

"Ab fab!! Hilarious! By the way, you look incredibly like Rashid Karim!"