Don't read this post

Don't read his either...

Couldn't resist? Well then you might be my type. I put out but I’m not easy so I'm gonna need a girl with little self control. I'm looking for someone that's fun and relaxed without too many hangups. I take care of my body so I expect the same from you.

About me, 6'0, 172, with a dark tan on my face, arms, and neck, but pasty white everywhere else. I have a squinty smile and snort when I laugh; I can cook and I smell like desperation. I'm currently a policy wonk, but after this Friday I will be collecting unemployment and watching chick flicks on Lifetime. I'm a confident adherent of the spaghetti monster faith that will probably act like a wuss. I'm sure you know the "wuss" type – I’ll call you 5 times a day because I am bored at home in my sweatpants, tell you that you're the one (especially if you’re making good money), confesses that he can't be without you (again, bored and im my sweatpants).... all after the first date. I'm very loving + committed in a relationship, and will suggest moving in together if you email me and I like your picture.

Last requirement. I get a lot of freaky messages here, so this is the "NO" list:
NO dudes, NO home porno invitations unless they pay well, NO i won't have sex for cash (OK, I will), NO bend-over boyfriends, NO i don't want to have sex with your wife (unless it pays well – cash, i.e. see unemployment).

If you're made it this far, don't stop now. After you've built up the courage, send me an email. It's cheap and easy, much like me ;) Include a picture if you've got it.

Spaghetti monster bless!



He gets letters:

" love what you are doing making fun of the tools on CL m4w postings. Keep up the great job."

"Everytime I read one of your messages, they crack me up! Thanks for the daily laugh."