My primary action item? You!

I was recently hired as a marketing manager at a firm even though I told them I wasn't a marketer, but I had some good ideas for marketing the firm. Which I do. However, when I was putting my thoughts to paper, it occured to me that one of the people on the marketing committee had a marketing background, and this person would probably be dissasified with my efforts as it lacked the jargon appropriate to a marketing plan. I started writing and thought I was a big phoney. But I thought I wasn't half bad. So I thought I'd write a craigslist ad. This is the result...

Envisioneer this potential partnership. I will be leveraging core competencies to redefine synergistic infrastructures in order to incubate impactful platforms for our potential frictionless interfacing. By utilizing cutting-edge models I can orchestrate intuitive deliverables that will enable high-end solutions to meet any unforseen challenges and take advantage of potential opportunities. My plan, architected to provide tighter integration and deeper collaboration, I will repurpose strategic content to enable you to recognize greater results from our potential collaboration, streamline efficiencies in the supply chain, and reduce costs. My "outside-of-the-box" thinking will have you shifting your paradigm, baby!